Poetry: Selection From Howie Good

Cancer Treatment

 

“Do you see the donut,” the cancer specialist asks, “or just the hole?” My eyes burn, though there’s only water in tears. Once cancer touches you, you belong to it, you’re marked with its ugly brand. Yesterday, to the screams of horrified tourists, a statue of the Virgin Mary in a cathedral in Linz, Austria, appeared to go into labor. Belief is elastic. And so, I lie in bed at night with the windows open, listening in on the gregarious insects at ease in the dark.

 

 

 

Another Holocaust Remembrance Day

 

I was born with a hole in me and so went searching for a way to fill it. You would think that by now I would belong to myself, but God’s justice is unreliable, a clock that runs slow. My ancestors were forced in the Middle Ages to wear pointed hats and yellow badges. Inevitably, they would be slaughtered in pogroms or expelled. It’s our turn. “Hitler should come back and gas you!” Jew haters yell. Despite the hair of the corpses in the crematorium ovens catching fire first, it was the head that always took longest to burn.

 

 

 

Insomniac

 

“Are you a back sleeper,” the mattress salesman asks, “or a side sleeper?” I’m a bad sleeper, tossing and turning beside my wife, who barely stirs. Eventually, I’ll throw off the blanket, slip out of bed, and go downstairs. I am by nature a worrier. At the moment I’m most worried about an upcoming procedure that involves threading a tube through a blood vessel in the arm or leg, allowing the doctor to see inside my heart. There might be disease. There might be blockages. The heart might look like our mismanaged planet, ruined by the catastrophic effects of stupidity and self-righteous arrogance. The wonder isn’t that I can’t sleep, but that anyone can.

 

 

 

The Nature of Things

 

I was standing by a tree as the dog did his business. The wind, which can reach deafening speeds here on the island, was uncustomarily still. Then a bird in the tree squeaked like a squeeze toy. I looked up. From wherever it was hiding among the leaves, the bird squeaked again, a sound  seemingly designed more for comic effect than evolutionary advantage. Only later would it occur to me that we ourselves make weird noises when undergoing the secret torture of sad thoughts.

 

 

 

Lemon Slushie

 

Day and night the Amazon delivery vans drop off brown packages. Too many people are preparing for something that won’t ever happen or that already has. Just because there’s no specific law against it doesn’t mean it isn’t a kind of crime. I’m exhausted by the effort required to think beyond the present moment, one part sugar to three parts water. My dream revealed what it’s like for the frozen embryos that never became babies. “Why would you do this to us?” they scold. Teaching a child to not step on a caterpillar helps get me where I’m going.

 

 

 

 

 

Howie Good's latest poetry collection, True Crime, was published by Sacred Parasite in Berlin this year.

 

What Remains Beautiful